


Sick days and Pick-up Lines

by theangelofdarkness



Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: F/M, Sickness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-08
Updated: 2016-03-08
Packaged: 2018-05-25 13:43:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,670
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6197299
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theangelofdarkness/pseuds/theangelofdarkness
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Carmen's off work sick and is bored. Luckily for her, her teammate Jolyon has a rather novel way to keep her entertained.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sick days and Pick-up Lines

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah I'm sick. I feel like crap. I've spent most of the day being sick. And this is what my fever delirious mind came up with. Enjoy guys. :)

                Carmen sighed as she slid further under her large, warm double duvet she’d brought down with her to snuggle under on the sofa. She hadn’t felt 100% for a few days now, but rather than give herself the time off she needed Carman had kept going into the factory and to the events the team needed her at. Add on top of this her simulator work and training, it was no surprise her body finally gave up and let the bug take over. She’d woken up that morning with a nasty headache before she was promptly sick. She called Renault and warmed them she wouldn’t be in, before taking her duvet downstairs and crashing on the sofa, a sick bucket close by. She was bored though. After watching a few episode of trashy TV she could accurately predict the next story line to happen, why were these shows so damn predictable. She also scrolled through her Facebook and twitter accounts. She though that might preoccupy her, but it was a slow day though and no one really seemed to be posting much. Groaning Carmen decided to message some people. Perhaps she could get a text conversation going with someone.

* * *

 

                Jolyon was just about to start his lunch when his phone pinged in his pocket to let him know he had a new message. He fished it out to see it was from Carmen. He knew his teammate had been off sick today, as she was missing from their meeting this morning. He was surprised the woman made it till lunch time before she started messaging people. Carmen was wonderful, but the girl was always running around doing something. So having to stay home sick must have been driving her crazy. He opened the message to see what she was after.

**_Jo is it possible to be sick of being sick?_ **

He smiled fondly at his phone, feeling sorry for her. Clearly Carmen was bored right now, and just wanted to get back to work, or be well enough to do something other than lie around.

**I’m not sure :( Get well soon Carms, is there anything you need? I can drop by on my way back from the factory this evening.**

He sent the message and sure enough there was a reply in a minute or so from her.

**_Thanks for the offer. I’ll be fine. Just missing some social interaction and a laugh with the team._ **

Jolyon sighed, thinking about what he could do to cheer her up when an idea formed in his head. Chuckling slightly, he typed out the text.

**You want a laugh. Fine. I challenge you to a pick-up line war.**

Carmen had to read though Jolyon’s text a few times, was he really suggesting that!

**_A what? Jo are you sick as well?_ **

She sent the text and waited for a response. Wondering just what her teammate had in mind.

**I’m not sick. I challenge you to a pick-up line war. Send your worst, stupidest, funniest pick up line. When the other can’t respond you win! I used to do this a lot when my friends were sick or someone was having a bad day.**

Carmen smiled at her phone, Jolyon really was a sweetie when he wanted to be. And she did appreciate his rather unique way of cheering her up. Or maybe it was more the fact he seemed to be implying she was a friend to him, rather than just his teammate.

**_Sounds like fun. I’m in._ **

**Brilliant. Ladies first Carms ;)**

Carmen thought about some of the lines she could use. She mauled over the decision before typing in her response to Jolyon.

**_Were you in Boy Scouts? Because you sure have tied my heart in a knot._ **

Jolyon laughed, but he was glad to see Carmen was getting into the spirit of the game. He thought about it before he sent his response back.

**Hey, tie your shoes! I don’t want you falling for anyone else.**

**_That doesn’t work Jo. I’m wearing my slippers :P - Are you religious? Cause you’re the answer to all my prayers._ **

Jolyon laughed. She was really getting into this. He thought about the best response before he sent his message out.

**Didn’t know you felt that way about me Carms ;)-You must be a hell of a thief because you stole my heart from across the room.**

Carmen groaned when she read the second part of the text. How many times had a guy tried that line on her? Too many, was the answer. At least this time she was enjoying the conversation.

**_Totally not heard that line before Jo :P-Stop, drop, and roll, baby. You are on fire._ **

Jolyon chuckled at Carmen’s response. She was being quite creative.

**Super creative-My name’s Jolyon. Remember it because you’ll be screaming it all night.**

**_A little optimistic aren’t we ;)- I’ve got an alarm clock that makes the best sound in the morning. Would you like to come and hear it?_ **

**Wow! Full contact right there Carms! No prisoners- Is that a mirror in your pocket? Cause I can see myself in your pants!**

**_Ugh, keep dreaming Palmer- Speaking of dreams. You like sleeping? Me too! We should do it together sometime. ;)_ **

Jolyon burst out laughing at Carmen’s comment. Which was probably the wrong time to do so as Frederic, his team principal, walk by his table.

“Something funny Jolyon?” He asked him. Frowning a little at his driver, there was no need for him to be so loud. And he could see Jolyon’s lunch was laying forgotten as he texted.

“Nothing boss. Funny text. Sorry.” Jolyon tried his best to supress the giggles

“Don’t forget your lunch, and the team meeting in five minutes.” Frederic reminded him.

“I won’t boss.” Jolyon nodded as he left. He groaned as he tucked into his food. Crafting a text to Carmen at the same time.

**Nearly got me in trouble with the boss for laughing so much, time out of this war while I’m in the team meeting- Also. This may seem corny, but you make me really horny ;)**

Just before he went into the team meeting he got a reply from Carmen.

**_Never ever use that line on a living breathing woman Jo :P I guarantee she will consider slapping you, if she doesn’t already do it. Have fun in the team meeting- Kissing is a language of love….so how about a conversation?_ **

* * *

 

                “Jolyon, what do you think?”

“Hmmm. Sorry?” He looked up from his brain storm. Jolyon hadn’t really been paying attention. He’d spent most of the meeting looking like he was taking notes. Only to be working on some cheesy pick up likes to send Carmen once the meeting was over.

“Jolyon it’s all well and good taking notes. But if you’re not paying attention because you’re taking them that’s possibly detrimental.” Frederic sighed. Jolyon nodded as Kevin leaned over his shoulder to read his note’s page.

“I’ll cook your dinner if you cook me breakfast.” Kevin said out loud. “Jo promise me you’ll never use that line on a girl. I’d like to not have to collect you from A&E after the stiches.”

“I won’t. And stop reading.” Jolyon splayed his hands out on the paper, blushing furiously.

“Jolyon what exactly are your notes on?” Frederic asked. Realising now that he’d probably not been paying attention the whole time. Jolyon sighed.

“They’re cheesy pick-up lines. Carmen messaged me earlier saying she was bored and sick. And to cheer her up I started a pick-up line war with her.” He admitted. Going even redder. Frederic shook his head.

“Did you two learn nothing from the team sexual harassment seminar last month?” He asked, watching as Jolyon tried to suppress a smirk. He and Carmen had sat at the back and spent the time making inappropriate remarks. He still remembers having to hold in the laughter when Carmen had turned to him and asked flat out ‘Is it still sexual harassment if the other person enjoys it and joins in?’

“We learnt…Something.” Jolyon shrugged. If nothing else, he learnt Carmen was not as innocent as she looked. And that she had a particular talent for turning almost anything into an innuendo. Frederic sighed.

“I give up with the pair of you.” He huffed. “Jolyon. This is the one and only time you’ll even zone out of a meeting. And I clear?”

“Yes boss.” Jolyon nodded.

“Right. Meeting over. See you all tomorrow.” Frederic said before leaving the room. “Jolyon can you come in an hour early. I’ll go through today’s meeting with you. And perhaps then you’ll think before you start zoning out in meetings to work on pick-up lines.”

“Yes boss. I’m sorry.” Jolyon told him as he left the room.

“Seriously you’re in so much trouble.” Kevin rolled his eyes.

“I know.” He sighed.

“Worth it?”

“Totally.” Jolyon grinned. “Carmen’s loosing this war.”

* * *

 

                Carmen woke up after a nice hour long nap when her phone buzzed. She smiled as she grabbed the phone. Sure enough the team meeting was clearly over as Jolyon texted back.

**How’s the patient doing? -Would you grab my arm so I can tell my friends I’ve been touched by an angel?**

She smirked at the comment he made. He really was going all out to win this battle. Fine, all that meant was that she would have to step it up a notch.

**_Just woke up from a nap, still feeling crappy but your texts are cheering me up- Your shirt has to go, but you can stay._ **

Jolyon felt slightly guilty for possibly waking Carmen up. If the woman was sick she needed rest. And to relax as well, not be constantly texting back and forth with him.

**Sorry Carms :( If you want to go back to sleep I’ll understand. I won’t count it as a non-response. -The only thing your eyes haven’t told me is your name.**

**_It’s okay Jo :) I need to stay awake now or I’ll never sleep later- So, come back to my place, and if you don’t like it I swear I’ll give you a full refund_ **

He grinned when he read Carmen’s response. A part of him was thrilled she was still up for this. He was enjoying the constant back and forth with her.

**I’m sure you will. I know how much you love sleep- I was so enchanted by your beauty that I ran into that wall over there. So I am going to need your name and number for insurance purposes**

Carmen groaned when she read his response, having to look away from her phone. It was too damn embarrassing! She had to persevere though. No way was she letting Jolyon win.

**_Wow! That was bad. Seriously bad. I’m cringing- I don’t have a library card, but do you mind if I check you out?_ **

**Like that’s any better?!- I hope you know CPR, because you take my breath away!**

**_Oh god they’re getting worse- I must be dancing with the devil, because you’re hot as hell._ **

Jolyon laughed at Carmen’s comment. This was still pretty tame considering some of the lines he could have used. This was bad? He was just getting warmed up!

**I’m just getting started. - I think there’s something wrong with my eyes because I can’t take them off you.**

Carmen laughed at the line as she made herself a cup of coffee, she was still feeling a little delicate. But she was pretty sure she could keep down the drink. The thought inspired her for her next pick-up line.

**_Well bring it on Jo!-Sorry, but you owe me a drink. Because when I looked at you, I dropped mine._ **

**XD Priceless Carms. And I know you. You’d never waste alcohol like that- Congratulations! You’ve been voted “Most Beautiful Girl In This Room” and the grand prize is a night with me!**

Five minutes passed after he sent the text and Jolyon didn’t get a response back.

**Carms**?

She’d probably fallen asleep or something like that. He’d catch her later. He started looking over his data from pre-season. Occasionally glancing over at his phone. Ten minutes went by before he got a text.

**_Sorry. I was just sick. Would have thought I’d thrown up everything by now. :( Apparently not.- I must be in heaven because I’m looking at an angel!_ **

As soon as he read her text Jolyon felt really guilty for waking Carmen up. The girl clearly wasn’t well at all. And she needed rest.

**Carmen go to bed! Sleep seriously, it’s the only way you’ll get over this. Or I’m coming to visit you to make sure you sleep!- I must be a snowflake, because I’ve fallen for you.**

Carmen read over the text again and again as she picked herself up off of the bathroom floor. She’d been mistaken. Coffee was a bad idea. But now she was panicking. She couldn’t work out if this was part of the game or real. A part of her wanted it to be real. Taking a breath Carmen typed out her response.

**_So come and visit then. At the end of the day- You know what material this is? [Grabs shirt] Boyfriend material._ **

She didn’t get another text after that.

“Great.” She sighed as she collapsed under her duvet again. This was going to be awkward as hell when they next met at the factory.

* * *

 

Carmen was disturbed halfway through her second episode of Downton Abbey by a knock on her front door. Frowning, she got up out of her cocoon of warmth to see who it was. She pulled her jumper round her, keeping out the chill that was in the air as she opened the door. Standing there was Jolyon with a bag in hand and a smile on his face.

“Hey.” Jolyon gave her a fond smile; despite the fact she was sick Jolyon thought she still looked as wonderful as ever. She looked tired and pale with a blush across her cheeks. “I brought chicken soup and films for us to watch.” He held up the plastic bag. Carmen smiled and Jolyon could see the sparkle in her eyes. “Also. Will you be my girlfrien? I left out the ‘d’ because you’ll get that later!” Carmen burst out laughing at his comment. Inviting him in.

“Jo you shouldn’t have.” She told him when he came in.

“I wanted to.” He told her, pulling her into a hug. He could feel her shivering and holding him closer to leach some body warmth. “Come on. Let’s get you back under your duvet covers. Then I’ll get the soup ready. And the two of us can hug and watch crappy films together.”

“You’re going to get sick.” She warned him.

“I won’t. We Palmers have amazing immune systems.” He replied.

“Alright. But don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

* * *

 

                “Hey Carmen. Feeling better today?” Kevin asked as the pair walked towards the development meeting they had for this morning. She’d woken up this morning feeling refreshed and better again. Even feeling well enough to come into the factory this morning. Especially now she wasn’t a walking germ factory.

“Hey Kevin. Yes I am. Did I miss much yesterday?”

“Not much at all he admitted as he held the door open for her. She thanked him before taking a seat and getting her phone out till the meeting started. She already had one text on it.

**Carms. I’m bored and sick :(**

 Jolyon texted her. She had to laugh. She did warn him after all. It was his fault he got so close to her when they were watching the films. He invited the sickness into his life.

**_And? What do you want me to do about it?  ;)_ **

**Pick-up line war, round 2?**

She grinned at the thought just as Frederic came in the room to start the meeting.

**_You’re on. Round 2. I’ll start as soon as this meeting is over. Prepare to lose Jo :)_ **

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed the story. Thanks for reading and hopefully I'll see you soon :) xx


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